Helpless

I understand and accept that life isnt fair... that bad things happen to good people. And i try not to wonder why... but I'll never get used to the helpless ache in my heart when theres nothing i can do.

Bully

      Do you remember, back in elementary school, being scared of the school bully? He was always bigger than you and knew exactly what buttons to push to hurt you. He knew what to say to make you cry. Sure, sometimes you got your ass beat, but most of the time seeing you run home crying was all the satisfaction he needed. It was so scary and humiliating, that you would avoid the bully at all costs. You'd hang out in different areas, or find a different route to walk to school. But when you did bump in to him, you'd almost be nice to them, hoping not to be the human target. And there was no use in trying to tell a teacher or a parent. It never did a damn thing. It would only get your ass whooped ten times worse when he found you again....
      Then we grow up, right?? And the infamous School Bully becomes obsolete... Or does he? Nope, unfortunately as adults we still have to deal with bullies. Cruel individuals who find pleasure in making your life difficult. People that hurt you and then find an excuse why it's ok that they did what they did. And why do they do that?? Why do they hurt people? Because they themselves are hurting. It's all a mind game that they play. For one reason or another, they are hurting inside and they need to world to feel their pain. But they are incapable of expressing their pain in productive ways. They are unable to communicate. So they attempt to "give away" their hurt feelings. They think that maybe if they put their pain on other people that they themselves wont hurt anymore. But that doesn't work. How could it? How could hurting someone feel good?? It doesn't. So as a result, they now hurt more than they orginially did. It's a never ending circle of pain. In the end, no one wins...

What's the right choice?

Why are the right choices the hardest ones to make?

I know what I have to do, but I question myself. Even with the strength to carry it through, I'm still never sure if what I did was the best thing to do. It's only natural to feel this way though, isn't it? That simply means I have a heart and that I care about the consequences. I just have to cope with the time of unknowing and await the long term effects... as difficult as that might be.

Life is eternal

Life is eternal, and love is immortal, and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight.

Lack of Enthusiasm?

"Depression is only Anger without Enthusiasm."

I can't recall where I heard that or who said it, but what do you think?
Is depression only anger?

A Land Far Away

Sometimes, when I'm left to my thoughts, my mind wanders through a land far away where only the dreamiest of souls roam...

Soaring through the sky on wings of wishes just waiting to come true...


Swimming through the waters of melodies not yet imagined and played...


Running through the fields of laughter, golden and innocent like that of a small child...


A Land far away where the endless possiblities of the heart are seeded, grown, and given life.

Bloggity-blog-blog

What is a BLOG?
What is the purpose of a blog?
To be yourself?
To be entertained?
To be creative?
To inform?
To keep in touch?
To be honest?
To write?

I used to have a blog. I started it in 2005 and stopped using it in 2009. I recently re-read all my blog posts. It was amazing to see what was going on in my brain during certain points of my life. After some thought, I've decided to start blogging again. I have a very active imagination. I'm always thinking. My brain never stops. Perhaps if I start putting it all down again, I'll feel better. Although, I might just re-post some of my old blogs too. Some of them are so witty and raw. Not to mention, this new blog will have a slightly different audience, if any, that may not know about my old poetry, music, and thoughts. So, here we go....